Goodbye my sweet Daddy

It is with so much saddness in my heart that I write my dear sweet father passed away on July 22, 2006. I can hardly believe he is gone. It happened very suddenly in the early morning and my life will never be the same. I will never look in my child's eyes the same way, enjoy the smell of rain right before it falls, look at a rainbow or drink from a red cup again. I lost my mother when I was 14 and she was 40 and now I have lost my father at 42 and he was only 69. How do you recover from the loss of a parent?

My father was wise and he was there for my every milestone. He saw me come into this world, saw me graduate from High School and then college. He gave me an unbelievable college education. He walked me down the aisle when I got married, he held my premature son when he was only a couple of days old. My father was always there for me and I for him. This picture was taken in April in his favorite place, the courtyard of his home in Florida. Here is is surrounded by 3 of his grandchildren. Here is where he was the happiest. I had such hopes for his retirement from dentistry. I had dreams for him and for my mom. I can hardly believe I will never hear his voice again, see his smile, have his arms around me. Below is what I wrote and read at his funeral.

My dad loved:
Summer fruit, playing golf, Paris-he said it was the most beautiful city in the world (and he was right.), White House hoagies, reading books with black and red covers, the house ice cold, drinking coffee in styrofoam cups, watching football,golf and the food network on tv, eating lunch on a paper plate, drinking cold drinks from big red cups, swiss pastry cookies, taking a nap, his friends, Pepsi 1, Jacque Brel, buying liquor, but not drinking it, hershey chocolate kisses, walking around barefoot in the house, his rolex watch, the musical A Chorus Line, his house in Florida especially the courtyard, his children, their spouses and his grandchildren.

Shari said, my dad never looked at his grandchildren with dry eyes. He loved being a Poppy.

But most of all my father loved my mom, Debbie.

Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize those were the big things, my dad was there for the little things and the big things:
the day he took me to college
the day my dad and mom walked me down the aisle to marry Jeff
the day Andrew was born 8 weeks early
the day I had my surgery
My dad could fix anything. He could make anything better. He was my hero, my superman.

My dad told it like it was. He didn't sugar coat things. He didn't sweat the small things. He was smart. He didn't like to talk on the phone. You would call and get one or two words in before he said, here's mother and give my mom the phone.

He loved buying clothes. For a dentist who worked in the basement, he had more suits, ties, shirts, fancy shoes and trench coats than anyone I have ever known.

He loved my mother Marilyn. The morning he came into my bedroom and told me she had died. I remember crying. I didn't cry for me, I was crying for him, for his lose. I was sad for him. Today I am sad for my mom Debbie, you have been a loving wife, friend, care taker and companion to him. He loved you with all his heart and all his soul.

I have been so lucky in my life. I have called 2 incredible women Mom. But I have only ever had 1 daddy and let me tell you I had the best daddy in the world.

I have no regrets. My father knew how much I loved him and I knew how much he loved me.

Love, love changes everything.
Hands and faces, earth and sky.
Love, love changes everything, how you live and how you die.
Love can make a summer fly or a night seem like a lifetime.
Love, love changes everything, now I tremble at your name.
Nothing in the world will ever be the same.

My father taught his children to be survivors. To life life each day and to look forward and not back. At this moment my heart is broken and I am so sad. I will always cherish the 6 days I spent with him in June and all the time we had together. I will cherish the memories of him playing with my son Andrew and I will remember he taught me to be strong.

Nothing in the world will ever be the same (from Aspects of Love). I love you Daddy.